Chapter 178
THE FORGOTTEN FIELDS (NOVEL) – Chapter 178
Even now, every time he recalled those days, he felt as if his insides were being torn apart.
Despite having been born an illegitimate daughter, she had been raised like a noble imperial princess. Throughout her entire life, she had only cared for the most valuable garments and jewelry, and she was a woman obsessed with cleanliness to a sickening degree.
That very same woman had once attempted to sleep looking ragged on a pile of dust-covered straw. Only because she did not wish to remain by his side.
Varkas forcefully averted his gaze, which had been fixed on her face, and repeated to himself: he must not read too much into this sudden change in her attitude. Perhaps her pain had worn down a bit with the passage of time, and with the healing of the wound from losing their child, it was natural that her resentment toward him had mitigated to some extent.
However, that did not necessarily mean she desired to be with him.
“So stop thinking about things that make no sense.”
“Yesterday…”
The sudden voice snapped him out of his thoughts, causing Varkas to shift his gaze from the window. Those blue eyes that just a moment ago were contemplating the outside world were now observing him.
“Where did you sleep yesterday?”
He frowned for an instant at the unexpected question, and then replied mechanically:
“I slept in the bedroom adjacent to the office.”
“From now on, sleep in your bedroom.”
His mind stopped working for a moment, and he looked at her with a rigid expression. Talia, who was playing with the metal ornaments of her belt with a serene face, added indifferently:
“If you continue sleeping there, the servants will murmur that the Grand Duchess has expelled the Duke from his own bedroom, will they not?”
Varkas pressed his lips together. In reality, he thought the matter did not differ much from an expulsion, but he did not say it openly. She continued sharply, tugging at the ornaments as if she were about to rip them off:
“I will use my original room, so you use yours. The war is over, and you will stay at Rydego Castle from now on; the Grand Duke cannot live in the office forever.”
“Do not worry about me. In any case, I will spend a lot of time resolving accumulated matters and will only be in the room for brief periods.”
“And do you manage the affairs of the territory all by yourself?” she suddenly flared up. “A man who has just returned after two years of fighting on the battlefields, what kind of official affairs are those?!”
He suppressed a sigh and explained in a calm tone:
“There are tasks that the delegates or vassals cannot perform on my behalf. And since I was absent for a long time, there are many matters I must inform myself about.”
“Even so, you must sleep well! The other nobles spend their time in hunts, banquets, and amusements, why do you work that way alone?”
“Many of those nobles who waste their time like that end up facing financial crises or being overthrown by their own close associates.”
“Not everyone is like that; you are the one who lacks astuteness.”
Instead of explaining to her the complexities of managing a gigantic city like Kalmore and hundreds of vast fiefs, he merely nodded his head in submission:
“Yes, it is because I lack astuteness.”
Her face flushed with a blush, and he made a great effort to avert his gaze from that countenance that looked upset. He did not want to deceive himself into thinking she was angry because she was worried about him.
No, perhaps there was some of that in her heart. Was she not that woman who showed her thorns to everyone, but in reality possessed a soft heart?
At the beginning of their marriage, he knew this woman had begun to open her heart to him a little. If she had given birth to the child without complications, they would now be sharing the same room and the same bed, and there would be no need to go about probing each other in the midst of this awkward silence.
Their child would be two years old now, and perhaps they would be sleeping side by side with the little one in the middle of them while he babbled a bit.
Varkas imagined that scene, and then quickly cleared his mind as if he had touched fire. He did not want to be a dreamer who immersed himself in useless assumptions.
“In any case, do not worry about my matter and continue using that room. You will need a spacious room for Khan to remain by your side, will you not?”
“That is true, but… it will look as if I am a bad wife who expelled her husband to the office without reason.”
“If a person is found who says that, I will expel them from the castle.”
“And do you think that is a solution?! If you do that, I will be the object of more insults!”
In the end, one of the small ornaments on her belt broke under the pressure of her hand. While she manipulated it between her fingers, she opened her mouth as if hesitating:
“Therefore, it would be better if…”
At that precise moment, the carriage that was advancing at a constant speed stopped. At the same time, the guard knocked on the door with a light tap.
“We have arrived, Your Excellency.”
“Wait,” Varkas uttered with a somewhat severe nuance, and then looked at Talia again: “Continue with what you were saying.”
“…It does not matter,” she replied with a flushed face and stood up, swaying slightly.
Varkas clenched his fist to contain the impulse to grab her by the waist to support her unconsciously. She looked at him and exclaimed as if she felt annoyed:
“What are you doing? Are you not going to escort me?”
Only then did Varkas get up, step out, and extend his hand to her. Talia took his hand and stepped down from the carriage carefully. At that instant, exclamations of admiration spread everywhere like waves.
Varkas averted his gaze and frowned upon seeing hundreds of people gathered for the ceremony contemplating Talia, dumbfounded. Some stared at her with open mouths, to the point that saliva almost escaped them.
He firmly gripped her arm, soft as silk, with one hand, and skillfully covered her with his broad shoulders. However, it proved impossible to block all those gazes fixed on her from every direction.
Enduring those sticky gazes that clung to her, he led her slowly toward the entrance of the Great Cathedral. Soon, the great nave of the chapel opened before them, where a cold air reigned.
As they advanced between the rows, thousands of citizens filling the pews of the faithful stood up all at once. Among them were wealthy merchants, lower-ranking nobles, and officials appointed by himself.
Varkas passed coldly in front of those who did their best to catch his attention, and headed toward the seats of the upper gallery. Upon the wide marble staircase on both sides of the altar were the seats reserved for the Shirkan family.
He allowed her to climb the stairs first and then placed himself behind her. He did so thinking that she wished to hide her gait, which suffered from a slight limp. However, it seemed that she no longer cared much about the gazes of the people.
Talia climbed the steps slowly while holding onto the railing with one hand, her head held high and an expression devoid of emotions. Everyone in the chapel contemplated that majestic scene in the midst of a breathtaking silence.
They were not gazes directed at a living, breathing being, but gazes of veneration toward something sacred and ominous at the same time.
Perhaps the priest in charge perceived the strange atmosphere that settled over the place, so he rose from his seat and rang the bell placed upon the altar with a rigid face. Only then did those who seemed to be under the effect of a trance regain their senses.
“We will begin the ceremony of the rite.”
With the solemn announcement of the clergyman, glimmers of shame and guilt appeared on the faces of some men. Varkas gritted his teeth; it was not difficult for him to guess the obscene thoughts crossing their minds. Throughout the entire period he served as her escort knight, he always had to be alert to those who spied on her with eyes full of greed.
He suppressed his growing annoyance and followed her in silence. In the seats of the second floor, some of his relatives had already taken their places, among them Lucas and Lina. Varkas responded to the nods of his siblings, who greeted them with serious countenances, and sat in the assigned seat by her side.
After a moment, the choirboys stood up and began to intone chants in the ancient language of Ossiria. While he looked down trying to hide his boredom, he heard the sound of a subtle laugh next to his ear.
He turned, dumbfounded, to find her face and her blue eyes shining like those of a mischievous girl.
“Look at that,” she whispered in his ear, and a strange warmth spread from the spot where her sweet breath brushed him. “His face has turned almost purple.”
He made a great effort to focus his attention on what she was pointing out. After a few seconds, he managed to distinguish the figure of the high priest standing before the altar. The man was looking at her with eyes full of indignation, as if he had witnessed a profanation of the sacred.
“He reprimanded me before and demanded that I wear clothes as modest as possible and place a veil over my face when attending the cathedral. It seems he has become infuriated because I came dressed up like this on purpose.”
She laughed like a nymph planning a malevolent prank, wondering what was so amusing about it.
Varkas frowned. Initially, she was not a very fervent devout, but neither had she shown any particular hostility toward the church in the past. Rather, had she not occasionally read theology books as if devouring them?
What had occurred during this time to make her turn hostile toward the priests in that manner?
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